One Day
by TrishaLyn
Summary: Finn comes to Rachel the day before New Directions heads to New York for Nationals to talk about his feelings. One Shot set days after 2x21


Title: One Day

Pairing: Rachel/Finn

Rating: PG (very tame, just a few minor language issues)

Summary: Set days after Funeral - The day before New Directions heads to New York for Nationals, Finn seeks Rachel out to discuss feelings

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nada. Please don't sue. I have nothing to give.

Author's note: I classify this as Finn/Rachel, but I'm clarifying now that this isn't a lovey dovey Finchel one-shot. It's more angstyish (Is that word? It should be!), but I still consider it to have serious Finchel undertones.

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><p>Of course she was still here.<p>

Less than 24 hours before they were to head to New York for Nationals, there was no other place Finn expected to find her but right where she was. Opening the door to the Choir room, Finn walked up behind where she sat at the piano bench, running her fingers softly across the keys in a soundless tune.

"You know the bus doesn't leave for another 15 hours or so, right?" Finn watched as her back tensed up upon hearing his voice. "You're not planning on spending the night in the choir room, are you?" He was only half kidding.

Rachel's fingers began ghosting over the keys once again. "Just wanted to practice a bit more."

"You're perfect, Rachel." He meant it in more ways than one.

Lifting her gaze, Rachel's eyes met his for a brief second. "Did you, uh, forget something?"

"I was looking for you." He'd gotten half way home after Glee rehearsal when he knew he needed to talk to Rachel. He needed to get his feelings off his chest before they made the trip to New York. He couldn't imagine spending the next few days in the city of her dreams without have told her how he felt about her.

Rachel looked thoroughly confused. "Okay…"

Stepping up to her, Finn grabbed her small hands and pulled her to her feet facing him. "I've been doing a lot of thinking, Rachel." Breathing shakily, Finn tried best to put his feelings into words. "I think I'm ready." Seeing her confusion, Finn continued quickly. "To let go of the past. To let go of all the things that have kept us apart."

Rachel's eyes began to fill with tears. Cupping her face in his hands, Finn's voice broke as he went on. "I love you, Rachel. So much sometimes that it scares the hell out of me. I love you. And I want this." Rachel's eyes closed slowly. "I want _you_, Rachel."

Finn's confession was met with silence as Rachel had her eyes tightly closed as several tears ran unchecked down her face. Whipping them away with his thumbs, Finn moved his face closer so their lips were mere inches apart and waited. It felt like a lifetime before Rachel made any sort of movement, but was in reality only several seconds.

Opening her eyes, her tearful gaze met his. "You don't get to do this, Finn. Not now." Trembling softly, Rachel grasped his wrists and slowly pulled them away from her face. Taking a step back, Rachel sucked in a shaky breath as she prepared for the inevitably emotional conversation she knew was about to take place.

Finn watched in silence as Rachel took a step away from him creating distance between them. They were mere feet apart, but to him they'd never felt further away from one another.

"Finn," Rachel began tentatively, "we're not doing this again." Seeing he was about to interrupt, Rachel rushed to continue. "You don't get to come to me now, after _months_, and just decide these things on your own."

Shaking her head, Rachel tried to tamper the anger down. Getting angry at Finn would not help the situation. It would not help either of them move forward.

"You're ready to let go of the past? Wonderful," Rachel spoke sardonically. "How _lovely_ for you." Glancing at him, Rachel could see the glassiness rise in his eyes as he too fought back the tears. "But maybe I'm not."

Finn shifted in surprise and confusion as he desperately tried to understand what she was trying to say.

Rachel took a deep breath. "Maybe I'm not ready to let go of the past, Finn." Walking over to the piano, Rachel slowly ran her hands across the glossy surface.

"Things have changed, Finn. I'm not the same person I was five months ago." Rachel chuckled humorlessly. "Heck, I'm not the same person I was three weeks ago." Turning towards him again, Rachel locked eyes with Finn once again. "That Rachel Berry would have melted to the floor the second you walked through that door and said you wanted to try again."

Growling softly, Rachel racked her hands through her brown locks. "Damn it Finn, if you had said any of this a month ago…"

Stepping towards her slowly, Finn tried to explain. "I know it's bad timing, Rachel."

"_Bad timing_?" Angrily, Rachel marched up to him and poked him in the chest. "This is beyond 'bad timing', Finn! I have a boyfriend now!"

Scoffing, Finn practically rolled his eyes. "Yeah, with Jesse St. Douchebag…"

"Stop right there."

And he did. Glancing in her face, Finn could see that she was beyond angry with him and that was absolutely not what he wanted from this conversation.

Glaring at him, Rachel could barely speak past the anger she was feeling. "Don't you dare, Finn Hudson. Don't you _dare_ stand there and act like you get to do this. Like you have the _right_ to do this anymore." Pointing her finger at him again, each of Rachel's next words were punctuated with a sharp jab to his chest. "_You_. Broke. Up. With. _Me_!"

"Don't you think I know that?" Finn's voice was beginning to rise to match Rachel's.

"Then just _stop_!"

Hearing the agony in her voice, Finn immediately swallowed the words in his throat.

Turning around, Rachel took several deep breaths in an attempt to calm down. "Why are you doing this, Finn?"

The hurt in Rachel's voice nearly broke Finn to pieces. He never imagined that his one seemingly innocent, if heavy emotional confession, could reduce such a strong girl to such heartache. It broke his heart that he didn't know how to make this right with her.

"Are you forgetting the reason we broke up in the first place?" Turning towards him, Finn could see the new tears frozen on her face.

Her words pierced his mind and unwanted images of a slightly younger Rachel kissing his best friend forced their way into his mind. Shaking his head to rid himself of the images, Finn tried to understand why she was bringing that back up.

"You broke up with me because I kissed Noah when we were still together, right?"

He didn't answer her. She knew his response. Rachel walked the several steps forward to put herself back right in front of him.

"So how can you stand here and ask me to do the same thing to someone else?"

Finn looked away. He didn't think about it like that. He'd never considered how expecting anything of Rachel at this moment would be expecting her to do the same thing he'd so furiously condemned her for doing months earlier.

Seeing he was beginning to understand, Rachel sighed softly. "Finn," she began, "in retrospect, maybe it was for the best."

"How can you even think that?" Breaking one another and spending months apart was for the best? Where was she going with this? It didn't make any sense.

Rachel smiled sadly. "Because I grew up, Finn. These past few months have been one giant learning experience. One I think I needed." Wiping the tears from her eyes, Rachel attempted to compose herself before glancing back towards Finn. "I know what I did with Noah was wrong, Finn. I – I know that. I hurt you and I will regret that for the rest of my life."

Finn could feel the moisture beginning to gather in his eyes again. "Rachel…"

"That's why I can't do this with you right now, Finn," she interrupted. "I won't."

He couldn't stop a tear from spilling over and sniffed to try to control his emotions. He needed to give her this moment. She deserved it. And he knew if there was ever going to be a chance of a reunion between them someday, these were things he needed to hear. No matter how much it hurt to hear them.

"I did it once," she continued. Her voice broke as she tried to express her feelings to him. "I did it and I lost you and that hurt more than _anything_ ever has before."

By now, they both had silent tears falling down their faces because of the raw emotion flowing between them.

Rachel swallowed in an attempt to stop the shakiness from showing in her voice. "The past few months have been some of the worst months of my entire life, Finn. Coming to school every morning knowing that I didn't have you anymore." Breaking eye contact, Rachel could feel herself becoming choked up with emotion. "Watching you walk by in the hallways knowing that you weren't mine. Sitting here in this room day after day after day watching you. Watching you watch _her_."

It was at that moment that Finn couldn't maintain eye contact any longer. Seeing Rachel struggle to reveal her feelings over the past few months, Finn couldn't handle the thought that she was in so much pain because of him. He couldn't remember the last time he felt so much guilt and shame knowing how much pain she had been in because of his inability to see that she wasn't perfect.

Rachel too was struggling with her composure but she knew that she needed to get this out. "And I know that it was my fault. I know that. But some days," her voice broke, "it hurt to even _breathe_. And that's when I knew."

Rachel's tear-filled gaze met his own, "That's the moment that I knew I _had_ to move on, Finn." A sob escaped her throat. "I had to or it was going to destroy me."

Standing on her tip toes, Rachel reached up and brushed the tears from Finn's face gently. Cupping his face in her hands as he had done with her, Rachel gave him a sad smile. "It's not your fault, Finn. I don't blame you."

"You should," his voice cracked with emotion.

Rachel shook her head at his stubbornness. "I made my own choices, Finn. I made my own mistakes. You can't take that from me. They're part of me now. And I learned from them."

Taking a step back from him, Rachel continued in a voice much calmer and filled with new maturity. "Every tear I shed, every moment of heart break I felt, they all helped me grow up. Too much of my life had been spent defined by you, Finn. I wrapped up everything I was in you so much so that when you were gone, I didn't know who I was anymore."

Rachel smiled at him and her smile told the story of a girl forced to grow up. "But I'm starting to again. I'm starting to remember the Rachel Berry who knew exactly who she was and what she wanted from life. And I know that girl would not allow herself to make the same mistakes over again."

Finn's heart broke. He wondered if this is how she felt those many months ago when he broke her heart.

"I'm not saying that being with you was a mistake, Finn." He could feel the tension start to reside a little. "I'm saying that allowing myself to become so wrapped up in you that I would turn into the type of person who would cheat on somebody the moment she's vulnerable would be a mistake."

Rachel's voice took on a steady, even tone. "And maybe Jesse and I are not soul-mates meant for forever." Chucking, Rachel acknowledged to herself how unlikely that scenario was. "Maybe we won't last. But I can't just let go of the past because I'm desperately afraid I'll turn back into the type of person I've spent the past five months growing out of. I don't want to be like that again. I want to be better than that."

It was hard for Finn to hide his disappointment, but he was beginning to understand where she was coming from. "I – I think I understand."

For the first time since this emotional confrontation began, Rachel's smile actually reached her eyes. "This isn't a closed door, Finn." She saw the way his eyes lit. "But I don't expect you to sit around and wait for me."

This time it was Finn whose eyes finally matched his smile. "I know you don't. But I will."

Rachel's eyes shot up in surprise.

"I'm not going to interfere. And I'm not going to go out of my way to cause you and – and Jesse grief, but I am going to wait." Grabbing her hand in his, Finn pressed a soft kiss to her palm. "And when you're ready, I'll be here. Because I love you. And because you're worth waiting for."

For one of the first times in her life, Rachel Berry felt truly speechless. Finn smiled at her before kissing her on the cheek and walking to the door.

"I'll see you in the morning, Rachel," he told her softly as he reached the door. "New York better prepare itself. Rachel Berry is coming and she's going to take the whole city by storm. I know it." Giving her one last smile, Finn walked out of the door.

Rachel stood in her spot in the middle of the choir room for a good five minutes trying to process what just happened. Her emotions were all over the place and she had no idea where to even start to process everything.

Finn wants her back? But what about Jesse? Rachel knew she was being truthful with Finn when she told him she wouldn't go back to the person she was months ago – the one who broke his heart by hurting him so deeply. She wasn't going to do that to Jesse. He may have made plenty of mistakes in the past, but he didn't deserve that. Nobody did. If she were ever going to return to Finn, she was going to make damn sure she was completely unattached to anyone else beforehand.

But where did that leave her? Did she want to break up with Jesse? Was she ready to give Finn another chance? She still loved him. Of that she was sure. Those sort of feelings don't go away easily. Did she love Jesse? She didn't think so, but she knew if given enough time, they could grow to love one another somehow. Was that enough?

Rachel's head was muddled and filled with so many questions. Grabbing her stuff, she moved to leave the room knowing those questions weren't going anywhere anytime soon.

As she exited the choir room, Rachel began to smile. She and Finn would be together someday. Maybe not tomorrow. Maybe not next month or even next year.

But they would be together.

One day.


End file.
